My Youth:Chapter 1

 　　My youth belongs to me, and I should spend it savoring the bittersweet experiences of life. -- Prologue

　　It was a gloomy day. A fine drizzle fell from the sky, and the clouds were thick, giving the impression that nothing could break through them. This was my least favorite kind of weather, but something else was even worse.
　　I'm in sixth grade this year. I'm a girl, not pretty, and my only redeeming quality is my decent grades. In the eyes of my parents and teachers, I'm a top student; in the eyes of my peers, I'm the envy of them. I was expected to get into the best junior high school in the county, but the moment they received their results, it was as if a bucket of cold water had been poured over them—I only got into the most ordinary junior high school.
　　Yes, I didn't get in. Even I found it hard to believe, but reality is always cruel. Actually, this junior high school isn't bad, but they felt it wasn't suitable for me. But I know I didn't let them down. I did my best; it's just that their standards were too high for me to reach.
　　An hour and a half ago, lines of clear, black Song typeface shattered the tranquility. I couldn't bear the disappointed, even disapproving, looks, the sighs, so I chose to come here, in this continuous drizzle.
　　This is a secluded path hidden in the woods, winding and meandering, but I like it very much. It seems isolated from the outside world; only I am here, without achievements, without worries, only the rustling of green leaves—the leaves of the holly trees.
　　I like holly trees because I admire their resilience against the cold winter, their resilience against harsh environments, though I cannot achieve that. This admiration might be a kind of faith and envy.
　　I stroll along, the light rain pattering, the wind blowing intermittently, the holly leaves rustling. My mood is terrible, a deep sadness mixed with resentment. My efforts have not yielded any reward, giving me an urge to run wildly. I desperately want to break free from the control of my studies, but I know it's just wishful thinking.
　　My phone rang. It was time for me to go back to that cramped little room. I looked up at the gray sky, which seemed to reflect the sky in my heart. Where was that ray of bright dawn?